Postponed

Originally posted March 3, 2012.

Many of you already know that we have decided to postpone my surgery that was scheduled for March 7th. Since some may not know I thought I'd do a post for those who might be interested. These past few weeks have passed by so fast and yet so slow. I have been spending countless hours surfing the internet learning everything I can about the treatment of my breast cancer. Just this week my doctor met with a board of doctors to discuss my case and to get their opinions. I also had a MRI this week that showed yet another suspicious spot along with the 2 other spots that we know to be cancer and 2 different types of cancer at that! Together with my surgeon who is treating me like a queen, the recommendations of the other doctors he consulted, the results from a blood test I had and the results of the MRI we have decided that it is best for me to have a mastectomy of my right breast. As if that isn't hard enough I am now left with the decision of whether or not to have reconstruction.

Reconstruction in itself is a very time consuming and painful thing to go through along with at least 2 additional surgeries. I've read that the average reconstruction takes anywhere from 8 months to a year or longer. My surgeon told me that he can do what is called a breast sparingly nipple saving surgery for me. That sounds great and the pictures I've seen from the results of that look so normal that they look real because I would be keeping the skin that is already there. With that option I will need to decide on what I would use to fill that voided space up with. There is the ever so popular silicone breast implant that I'll address first. I honestly can't see myself doing this one because I'm scared of being allergic to it because I have many allergies. There is a test that I can take to see if I am allergic to silicone which I could do and I might do. But, then there is the slight right that it could leak or break that scares me. The silicone implants are also known to get hard and need replaced later down the road. I don't want to have surgery 10 years later or even 15 years later. With all that being said I do not feel as though the silicone implant is an option for me.

There are a number of options though. One is called a TRAM Flap. They use your belly fat and muscles to create a new breast. In essence a tummy tuck would be performed with this procedure also. I do not consider this option as one that I can do. I do not want to use any muscles from my stomach because there are just way too many side effects from that. There is also a lot of recovery time from this procedure. There is another option that I am considering that is called the DIEP. The DIEP is similar to the TRAM Flap except you do not use any of the muscles from your stomach. The downside to me is you are cut from one side to the other side of your belly.

I also have been told by my surgeon that we can not do an immediate reconstruction. The main reason is we do not know yet and won't know until after my surgery if I will need to do chemo or radiation. They can't do those if you have already had the reconstruction. During my first surgery a plastic surgeon would have to place an expander inside my breast that has a balloon type contraption that would have to be filled with salt water every so often at the plastic surgeons office. They would continue filling it until it gets to the size that I would need it to be. Once it is the right size then I would need another surgery to remove the expander and use one of the methods above to fill it with.

It is all so overwhelming for me but it is something that I have to make a decision on soon. I do have an appointment with a plastic surgeon this week to discuss my options. I might even cancel it. I've talked to a few ladies that I know personally who have had breast cancer who did not do reconstruction. They wear a prosthesis in their bra and they are happy and healthy and cancer free. That is the main thing that I want and need from this surgery is to be cancer free! One lady who had to have both breast removed is thrilled to not have to wear a bra at all!

Since I've just recently received these results this Thursday I have went from I don't want reconstruction to I do to I don't want to do it. I appreciate your prayers to help me to make the right decision for myself.

Angela